wednesday: pic of the week, separation anxiety.

I always thought you deal with separation anxiety outside of yourself…like, your children have separation anxiety when it comes to leaving YOU.

And though there have been a few times that Jos will get whiney when we leave him, today I realized that its ME that gets the anxiety.

The mom…his parent. I’m the one dealing with it.

I deal with it when I shoot a wedding; heck, when I am gone shooting a simple engagement shoot. When he is in God’s kids at church. When Ben takes him for a ride on the skateboard. When we go to the same place but ride in separate cars.

YES. You read right…We had to take two cars today because Ben had to leave where we were going and head straight to work afterward. And josiah’s car seat was already in Bens car, so he rode with Ben, and Darby rode with me.

I had my camera, like always…and I wasnt sure what todays pic of the week was going to be…and then I saw my little buddy staring at me through daddys window and waving at me…

It was hard to back out of the driveway let alone get this shot.

I wonder what kind of a wreck I’ll be when he starts going to school one day. Or when he leaves for college. Or finds comfort in a wife instead of his mommas arms. When he leaves for good…and then when I get to see him hold HIS little one, God willing, someday. How will I feel?

I’m sure I’ll be a lot more of a wreck then, though its hard to imagine just how tremendous a feeling can be when you’ve never felt it…because though I think that it hurts now, it will be all the more bittersweet, those days…where I will say goodbye to him over and over.

My dear sweet Josiah, I love you with all of my heart.